This is, by far, the STUPIDEST thing I have come across today. It's only 7 a.m., though, so the day may hold a few more gems of idiocy yet.

Let me get this straight -- a middle-aged woman is having a flap of skin stitched back into place so that she can "give up" her virginity all over again, this time to the man of her dreams, her husband. Honey, you are not "giving up" anything, you're just getting a little torn and introducing a little pain into the experience. If pain is your thing, more power to you, but call a spade a spade.

And for the man that is excited by this? I can't... I can't... I'm stumped. "How was your cruise, Bob?" "Well, Gene, I had the time of my life. When I bopped my ol' lady, my penis encountered a small piece of skin and for a moment, I really believed I was fucking a virgin, an innocent maiden, if you will, one who has not seen my dick a thousand times or had three college boyfriends and at least one experimental girlfriend before we got married. There was even a little blood. I'm in love all over again with my refurbished, NEW wife. It's incredibly hot, you should try it."

I am all for kink, I mean for Pete's sake, my partner is my sexual SLAVE, so if this is some kind of twisted role-play thing, again, I say more power to them. But somehow, I don't think they've gotten that far, this just seems like another silly trend, another way for a woman to alter her body in the hopes of maintaining her youth and beauty, right up there with those freakish tit jobs, silly-looking lip injections, and horribly frightening face-lifts.

I am so happy this revirginized woman is not someone I know, because that is definitely a friendship that would call for reevaluation. Well, at least it keeps their money going to a good cause, plastic surgeons need that cash more than anyone and I can think of no better way to spend my next bonus than to sew up a flap of skin inside my vagina so that when it's torn out, I can pretend all those sexual encounters never happened. Or, I'll just buy a 16th century gown and coo, "Yes, My Lord," to the man I go to bed with every night.

Honestly. I'm still baffled at this one.

-Barbarella

previous | next