And another little pattern continues... I just did NOT want to go to work today. Already "worked" from a weekend of staying up late, etc. My friend's official party for her birthday on Saturday night was a success, in our eyes. I was a little disappointed that more people didn't show, but I knew upon looking at her, that everyone who she truly wanted to be there (aside from a select few who were out of town), was. So it was wine and good music at the wine bar, and laughter and good friends afterwards.

There was a lot of drama around this party, and the few things I realize from trying to coordinate with people to throw someone a surprise, is find out what the birthday girl wants first. And, if she's not too keen on whatever grand plan you had, DON'T freak out, and DON'T blame her for it. It's HER fucking birthday, so who cares what everyone ends up doing as long as she's happy with it?

It was funny, though, to hear 4 different women freak out over something that seemed so petty to me. In my mind, it was a given, what we would do in light of new information, and it was also a given that as friends, we were flexible and able to switch and compromise at the drop of a hat. It all ended up perfect for the birthday girl, and perfect for everyone else in attendance... as I knew it would from the beginning.

Anyway, I'm taking stock again in my life. Analyzing my priorities and adjusting my schedule to accommodate any changes that need to be made. I feel like I need to get some shit together in my life. And I know I will. Because nothing that I'm stressing about is anything that could kill me. These are bills, tickets, social changes, etc. The little things. Those little things that, if you let them grow on their own, can become huge things that get their kicks by beating the shit out of you.

None of this makes sense to me. See what happens when I go 2 weeks without writing? I'm completely discombobulated. And I don't even know if I spelled that right.

So, I'm just going to enjoy my "day off". I have some errands to run, some apartment to clean. Some things to read, and a whole lot to write.

-Barbarella

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