I went to help my sister grade some English papers tonight. A much mellower form of escape, I must say. Spent the day with a good friend, Zim, helping him move some things, run some errands, had some lunch and some laughs. So nice.

So I just came VERY close, like SCARY close to posting a personal ad on Yahoo. I know, tell me about it. Psycho. It looked like fun, like hey, what a great way to meet people I don't know yet, you know, like men who have nothing at all to do with the groups of friends in my life. Strangers. How easy would it be to keep them separate if they're all alone? How fun and drama-free would it be to date them? But whoa there, Nelly. I got halfway through the damn thing, thought it looked ridiculous, remembered that I did that when I first moved to LA, to meet people, to date, etc. It went HORRIBLE, a hat-trick of shitty dates.

The first one was some schmoe-dork-kid allergic to smoke and alcohol (not good for me at the time), who had more Alanis and Fiona than I did. The second was a 22-year-old virgin who didn't know how to make a pass. At one point, he said, "You wanna see my woody?" And I shit you not, he unzipped his pants and pulled a little Woody-Woodpecker stuffed animal from the depths of his crotch. I had to mock him blatantly to get him to leave.

And the third? A Porno director, turned out I knew the porn star (Adam something) who cheated with this guy (Howard's) girlfriend. Nice. Oh, and he doesn't tip. No thank you.

The only way for me to meet someone and KNOW that I'm interested in spending more time around them is to do it in person. Maybe it's just me. I met a very cool guy over the weekend, and could tell from a 10-minute talk that I'd like to see what else is going on with this cat. So what the hell was I doing placing a freakin' ad? As if I have ANY time right now to go through the motions of phone calls and meetings? Uh uh. I'm not even going on a date with this guy I met, too much right now. Instead, I'm politely letting him know where I'll be and when, publicly, and if he wants to go and see me (without me having the obligation of sticking by his side) than he is more than welcome.

That's really all I have the energy for right now. That, and well, you know. Anything else that's "easy". It's going to be a busy week, and I don't even have a Halloween costume. C'est la vie, mon cherie. We will see, we will see. I'm not too worried about anything right now. Should be, but I'm not. So let me enjoy this for a bit, will ya?

-Barbarella

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