I have clearly not been listening to my iPod enough. Because just a few songs in, and I'm like, geeky excited about the songs playing through my little earphones. Geeky. Dancing in my seat, closing my eyes, singing along and totally off key. Music can be such a release. I woke up stressed this morning, with the thoughts of things I need to do, and knowing that I'm not necessarily in the mood to do them. Right now, I'm just warming up to get myself in the mood to finish my next column. The music, this automatic writing, is helping.
But there's something else that gears me up a bit -- I ventured past my doorstep this weekend to see some friends and family. Many of them had stories about people they've encountered who read my weekly diva column on a regular basis. The things that went through my head: Really? Weird. Cool!
I rarely think of people, outside of my family, actually reading my column. But the more I venture out, the more I discover that everywhere I turn, someone is reading, and liking, my words. And it gives me this most unbelievably wonderful feeling.
In a little over a week, I will be reading a selection of my columns in front of a classroom at a local college. I'm supposed to read for about half an hour and then answer questions from students. I hate to admit that I'm nervous as hell, despite my experience in public speaking. This is different. It's one thing to write things down and send them out, one step removed from people's reactions. In this case, I'll be standing in front of people. Reading. Immediate reactions aplenty to such personal shit.
M.s. says practice, practice, practice! He's got some high-tech shit and will be taping some of my better practice reads. Always the supportive partner, my beloved slave.
The jury's still out on whether or not I'll don feathers for the read. I guess it depends on whether or not I can wear them in such a way as to keep them out of my face, from landing in my lipstick and then smearing across my cheek, leaving some kind of horrid and distracting gash. Though, come to think of it, a distraction might be nice.
All warmed up. Time to switch to Thievery Corp. and get to work.
-Barbarella
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